In the shadow of the virus, the girls will significantly lower their standards: erected and with the skin attached to the muscles it’s all you have to promise.
Do you want to know what time it is the end of the world? Listening to REM
won't be useful.
won't be useful.
It doesn't matter if the old car takes a few scretches more. Stay away.
Behind the Great Wall. Provides protection from the Mongols, Huns, and
people like that. And if you think that there are no more, take a look down
the street.
people like that. And if you think that there are no more, take a look down
the street.
Get used to reason on interstellar scale: if they took the Earth, perhaps
the easiest thing would be to change the solar system.
the easiest thing would be to change the solar system.
If you see that God is purple and has six arms, once before him avoid the songs of Red Gen and say few words of appreciation for the cows and spicy foods.
After some time zombies are around you, you will want to make them the verse: please do, they don’t notice anything.
Humanity is about to be exterminated by a deadly pandemic, and are you still drinking from the bottle? Have a little of common sense!
Take refuge where you like, but in this case, keep away from the White
House.
House.
One thing: do not fret. For cars, a hyperactive man is like a Duracell.
A peaceful and relaxing place is always the Antarctic. But the low
temperatures make it more difficult for re-settle, if you know what I mean.
temperatures make it more difficult for re-settle, if you know what I mean.
Fleeing by car is always a solution, however, be sure to fill up before the
alien invasion.
alien invasion.
If you're already dead, remember that you must go out from the grave to be judged. The advice is to opt for a cheap coffin, such as those on sale at Wall Mart, that can be broken also by skeletal hands, and it’s important to avoid oak and ash trees that are the most resistant. The last thing you want is to miss a resurrection because the quality of your coffin is too good.
Okay, you can also spend the night in the morgue, but there is the rule of hourly hotels: you can’t open the drawers.
For Heaven’s sake, at least now, with 98% of the human race infected from a deadly virus, use a condom!
New job opportunities: you could do the robot that stacks garbage and you
could pick up a robot-girl that seems an iPod.
could pick up a robot-girl that seems an iPod.
Be careful not to get caught with a Norton Antivirus by those of resistence,
you risk lynching.
you risk lynching.
A safe haven could be Atlantis, a city protected by millions of cubic meters
of water. Contraindications? May not exist.
of water. Contraindications? May not exist.
Fleeing is always a dignified option in front of a space battleship.
Helicopters and planes will be fine, just be aware there isn't also the
President of the United States on board.
Helicopters and planes will be fine, just be aware there isn't also the
President of the United States on board.
According to many people, carrying a holy picture would reduce the penalty in the case of Purgatory.
Pardon, in a cemetery? Apply yourself a little more, please.
It’s strange, but post offices are a good choice: you just plug up the loophole by which you can pass the envelopes and you can easily talk to friends and relatives through the glass.
For those who don't want to work: in case of flooding, apply for a job in
the fire service.
the fire service.
Are you looking for the Resistance? You find them in the sewers, perhaps
mutated, but always with a great desire to do party.
mutated, but always with a great desire to do party.
If it seems useless, let it where it is. In 500 years, the next human
civilization will dig up and make crazy hypotesis about its use.
civilization will dig up and make crazy hypotesis about its use.
It is roumored that the Americans have wonderful bunkers. Becoming Vice
President of the United States can be useful. Not President, mind you, cause
that one always dies.
President of the United States can be useful. Not President, mind you, cause
that one always dies.
Passing under the Holy Door of St. Peter a couple of hours before the End of the earth is a good idea. Use an axe to open a hole whether it is closed is NOT a good idea.
Zombies know three words: "Mnnnnhh", "Blaaaargh" and "brains" and can’t decline any of them.
You might become the last man on Earth, ok, but look on the bright side: you could be Will Smith.
In these situations, an united family can overcome any adversity. Except
perhaps the opening of a volcanic fault in the dining-room.
perhaps the opening of a volcanic fault in the dining-room.
Many advanced machines, such as scanners and printers, can be knocked just
ordering them to do what they have been built for.
ordering them to do what they have been built for.
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